the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize