he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
