If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
no you cant smoke seaweed
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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