I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
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Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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