even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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