You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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