and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
