Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
