apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize
