Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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