God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
