Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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