You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
