Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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