I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize
