girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
