update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Randomize
