yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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