We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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