So drunk its hurt
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
