Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
