you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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