me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
