you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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