trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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