Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
