no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
