I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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