Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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