Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
