As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Randomize
