the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Everclear isn't food dammit
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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