i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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