yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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