Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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