I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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