bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
