when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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