they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
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Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
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I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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