I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
