No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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