I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I am spending my child support on dildos
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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