My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize