How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
