I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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