Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  I woke up on my floor...

  (1-516): View more from New York

  I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...

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  (516): I woke up on my floor... (1-516): I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop... http://tfl.nu/u1o5
  Replies (12) Good night (3849) Bad night (663)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.

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  (317): Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am. http://tfl.nu/ygwv
  Replies (11) Good night (909) Bad night (5376)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.

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  (719): Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now. http://tfl.nu/m6w8
  Replies (25) Good night (4590) Bad night (1344)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.

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  (910): Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days. http://tfl.nu/nw4c
  Replies (10) Good night (659) Bad night (4296)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....

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  (309): so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower.... http://tfl.nu/5ddp
  Replies (14) Good night (1129) Bad night (4212)
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  (209): View more from California

  I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside

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  (209): I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside http://tfl.nu/5a48
  Replies (3) Good night (1883) Bad night (889)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.

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  (205): He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero. http://tfl.nu/osga
  Replies (6) Good night (3415) Bad night (599)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.

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  (727): It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together. http://tfl.nu/hikf
  Replies (30) Good night (920) Bad night (5060)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.

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  (314): I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume. http://tfl.nu/mjn1
  Replies (11) Good night (1465) Bad night (524)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.

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  (360): sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name. http://tfl.nu/z35x
  Replies (12) Good night (2721) Bad night (620)
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  (949): View more from California

  am i gonna have visuals on this?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire

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  (949): am i gonna have visuals on this? (414): you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire http://tfl.nu/3sug
  Replies (13) Good night (1625) Bad night (487)
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  (619): View more from California

  Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.

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  (619): Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll. http://tfl.nu/87wg
  Replies (4) Good night (858) Bad night (1009)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward

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  (317): We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward http://tfl.nu/ufug
  Replies (6) Good night (1466) Bad night (696)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.

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  (919): They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am. http://tfl.nu/0bdo
  Replies (0) Good night (442) Bad night (226)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night

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  (717): i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night http://tfl.nu/ncnb
  Replies (2) Good night (470) Bad night (222)

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