I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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