you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
vagina is talking i cant
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
