what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
