i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
