The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize